The Bat Relocation Program

Gentle Reader,

I realize I may have been a little harsh in my description of the treatment of the bats that had taken up residence in our home. I know the place was vacant for such a long time, the bats assumed it was abandoned and thus, available for occupancy. Bats actually eat their weight in insects every night and that includes a whole lotta mosquitos...which of course is a great service to all of us because it keeps the nasty West Nile virus in check.

I really didn't mind the bats per se except for that one time when I was snuggled into my bed, just dozing off to sleep, and one flew into my face. I will admit to a little panicked flailing and maybe even some exclamations of surprise and dismay. But other than that I reacted with complete decorum and dignity.

We wanted to work with the bats--find a way for all of us to get along. You know "you catch my mosquitos, I'll let you live"... a "win-win" for everyone. So, we called in a mediator. A professional in this field. A "Wildlife Specialist" if you will...that's what his business card said anyway. This Condoleeza Rice of the animal kingdom came to our home and assessed the situation. Of course he came at DUSK, because that was the only time that worked for the bats. (They keep some crazy hours those bats.) The bats were happy to move to the new home we provided for them (see above picture). And we have all been living HAPPILY EVER AFTER.


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