Blood and Fire and Vapors of Smoke

We all enjoyed a great Conference Weekend. It was an adventure listening to it on dial-up audio.
After Conference, it was a little chilly so we thought a fire would be nice. We haven't had a fire in our giant fireplace yet. We did have it inspected by a chim-chimanee chimney sweep. He said it might have trouble drawing the smoke up unless we start with a small hot fire. Apparently it was either not hot enough or not small enough because smoke began to fill the house. Of course Dad responded with his usual "calm, cool, collectedness". Soon, it looked like he was going to pop a blood vessel in his head. In the meantime the smoke was billowing through the house. Our main worry was setting off the alarm because it goes directly to our security company and they call the fire department. They charge large amounts of money if you cause a false alarm, so you can understand why Dad was so alarmed. Somehow we managed to gather from his shouting: "OPEN A DOOR! OPEN A DOOR! OPEN A DOOR!" That someone should open a door. I opened a door. But he couldn't see the open door because of the smoke. So naturally he continued to shout: "OPEN A DOOR! OPEN A DOOR! OPEN A DOOR!" While we all stood in the smoke wondering if he would stop shouting long enough to hear us say "The door is open." Shane responded to the primitive "fight or flight" instinct and ran to his room and shut the door. The problem was finally solved with a fire extinguisher. This brought up the problem of everything being covered with the powdery residue from that. It was a lovely ending to our peaceful, uplifting Conference weekend.